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Don’t do this:

A North Riverside [Illinois] woman has been charged with endangering her baby boy over the weekend.
Chicago police officers say they found 27-year-old Jamie Riley drunkenly holding her 3-month-old infant son under her arm like a football and struggling with a stroller on the 5400 block of Harlem Avenue when they arrived at 4:30 p.m. Saturday, according to the Chicago Sun-Times.

The punch line:

Riley, of the 2300 block of Burr Oak Avenue, told police she had been drinking vodka. She and her husband were celebrating because the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services had dropped an investigation into her son’s safety.

Via Lowering the Bar.

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